Saturday, 05 April 2008 00:00
I can't paint my toenails to save my life. How, on earth exactly, are you supposed to use a tiny brush to paint a less than even surface? How are you supposed to squish your toes between the little foam teeth of the toe separators? And feet... don't get me started on how disgusting feet are. So you won't catch me paying anyone to paint my toenails either. Pretty toenails aren't part of the package deal with me.
I don't do pretty. Not really. Yeah, I'm a former pageant title holder. But quite frankly, if you got to know the other girls, you'd realize the judging was based on ambition and presentation, not aesthetics. And that was good for me. I won the crown and the much needed cash and got to wear a pretty dress. For that night, for a few parades, I did pretty. But I don't do pretty very much.
I have, and have had, lots of friends who did pretty like it was a career. But me, I'm a midwestern girl who will never feel comfortable in any cultured city that requires things like "a sense of style," or "color coordination," or "current trends." I like t-shirts and old comfy jeans. I like sweatpants. And as many times as I've tried to do something cuter than that, I always find myself fading back to what works, what is comfortable, what is me.
Ani Difranco sang, heroically, "I am not a pretty girl." And I echo the anthem because, I am not. My life, in its mix of mistakes and miracles, is not always something nice to look at. But always, always, it is colored by grace and forgiveness. It is painted with lessons learned and lives touched. And it is a picture of change - of a Mighty God working a Great Work in the heart of a Little Girl who mostly just does her best. And though I can't paint my toenails to save my life, He has already painted a picture of sanctification and holiness that, with time and effort, I can hope to paint-by-number - to mimic, to grow.
It's an amazing thing, this transformation of grace that God works in our lives... transforming even those of us who never had a chance as a "pretty girl" into the perfect image of himself.
